I’m actually not as broken as I thought I was going to be, at least at this point in the semester. Everything is ok. Maybe because I have these sessions where I talk to myself to pep me up. It’s a necessity. But mostly, I am still intact because I can’t let myself breakdown. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve had a mental breakdown a couple of times, but nothing severe or life-altering. Just being homesick. Being lonely. But I haven’t been destroyed yet. Mainly it’s because I’m going at this blindly. I’m not thinking about what I’m missing out on, or what I’m giving up. I’m trying to be goal-oriented. I’m trying to put in perspective how much people believe in me. How much people are investing in me. Those are the people that I depend on. They’re the ones who are preventing me from being destroyed.